Nancy Silverton's Books of the Year, in today's Wall Street Journal

Chef Nancy Silverton on Richard Russo and Marisa Silver

- Wall Street Journal, Dec. 10, 2016 by Bari Weiss 

To me, a great novel is like a great meal. The ingredients—no, make that the characters—meet, come to a boil, then simmer and, hopefully, meld together in such a deeply satisfying way that I linger. I can’t put my fork—book!—down.

In the past few years there have only been an armful of books I have loved: David Benioff’s “City of Thieves,” Donna Tartt’s “The Goldfinch,” Michael Krikorian’s “Southside,” Anthony Marra’s “A Constellation of Vital Phenomena,” Abraham Verghese’s “Cutting for Stone” and Elena Ferrante’s four Neapolitan novels.

But this past year I’ll happily add two to my short list. Marisa Silver’s “Little Nothing” was a great escape—a dark, mysterious adult fairy tale about a dwarf girl who turns into a wolf and then a . . . I won’t ruin it. With someone else’s pen, this love story could have been a mess, but Ms. Silver’s engaging, heartfelt style brought it together for me. I felt so deeply for this outcast and, perhaps even more, for the man who loves her unconditionally.

My other book for 2016 is Richard Russo’s “Everybody’s Fool,” the sequel to “Nobody’s Fool.” I see Paul Newman every time Sully’s name appears. And we all know that’s special. 

Ms. Silverton, a chef, is the author of “Mozza at Home.”

Trump Said To Be "Seriously Considering" Naming President Obama As Secretary of State

In a stunning statement in a stunning year, President-elect Donald J. Trump said Friday he would "seriously consider" naming President Barack Obama as his Secretary of State following their very cordial White House meeting yesterday as well as a growing bi-partisan movement in Congress urging him to do so.

The Veterans Day announcement, made by the president-elect's campaign manager Kellyanne Conway at Trump Tower, was meet with such slacked-jaw wonder by reporters, most of who thought she was joking. 

"I am not joking and neither is Mr. Trump," Conway told the gathering after seeing reporter's initial reaction. ."I can understand your skepticism, but the meeting yesterday between President Obama and Donald Trump was so unexpectedly in-accord that the subject was broached."

Conway said Trump had initially said something along the lines of  "You should be my Secretary of State," after the two agreed about the need to end the slaughterhouse that is Aleppo.

"But," Conway said, "After the two fell into step on several key issues, Mr. Trump asked the President if he would actually consider the position if offered."

Though the two meet in private, the closest aides to them were later privy to a tape of their conversation. A close aide to Obama, speaking off the record, said "The President seemed  speechless at first. but then said he would give it extremely serious thought."

The news was met with curiosity across the nation and on the world stage. 

Jim DeMint, the Republican senator from South Carolina, considered among the staunchest conservatives in all of congress, said "This is absurd,  Though even an old right-of-Goldwater codger as myself can see the advantage of having a ex-president as Secretary of State. And it would sure the heck unify a clearly divided nation."

As midnight fell on Beirut, Michael Ali, owner of the popular Azzom Pizzeria, heard the news via Skype. He shook his head, smiled and said "You Americans are crazy. That's why we love you."

Kellyanne Conway said "Mr Trump's decision to appoint Obama as Secretary of State, if he accepts that is, will be announced before Thanksgiving."

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Trump Yields To Pressure, Will Release "2nd Angle", Mythical View of "Zamensky's Fall"

With demonstrators across the nation chanting "Show it Now", President-elect Donald J. Trump has agreed to release the nearly mythical movie "2nd Angle", a stunning - and different view- of the classic American film "Zamensky's Fall'. 

Rumors have persisted for years that a second camera caught the infamous slip by Douglas Zamensky which was made into a feature film loved the world over. But, few have ever claimed to see it and millions -perhaps billions -  thought it was pure urban legend.

Until now. 

Like the original, the movie tells the story of Doug, a young white man from Idaho whose attempt to make it big in Los Angeles is thwarted by the intense needs of the staff at an Italian restaurant and by the equally demanding needs of Rollin 60s Crips who constantly rob him

Doug wisely decides to move to Orange Country and becomes the general manager of Pizzeria Mozza, Newport Beach. It is here, in the restaurant's parking lot, the movie's most famous scene occurs.

Thursday, in an attempt to united the country, Trump announced he would play "Zamensky's Fall" at his inauguration in January.    This led to the protests - allegedly organized by former Zamensky associate Chelsea  Olmstead - to also release "2nd Angle".

Trump, the the astonishment of most, agreed with the protesters. 

"Every time Don watches Doug fall, he laughs," said Kellyanne Conway, Trump's campaign manager. "And, boy, do we need some laughs now." 

The original movie, "Zamensky's Fall" can be seen in Thursday's article here - . http://www.krikorianwrites.com/blog/2016/11/9/zamenskys-fall-to-be-played-at-trump-inauguration

"Zamensky's Fall" To Be Played at Trump Inauguration

Speaking with a gravitas rarely heard, President-elect Donald J. Trump announced Wednesday that the classic American comedy "Zamensky's Fall" will be played repeatedly during his inauguration in January in hopes of bringing "tears of joy to an anxious nation."

The announcement was meet with universal bi-partisan support, 

"This is a game changer," said a Beirut-based CIA agent who spoke on condition of anonymity.   "The 'Fall' brings people together, I don't care if you're a Republican or Democrat. A homo, a lesbo or a straighto. A Sunni or a Shiite. A Giants fan or a Dodgers fan. A Sine Qua Non drinker or an Olde English guzzler. Everybody loves Zamensky's Fall.."

MGM announced they would remaster the film to 70mm glory and add a "director's cut' in which the film's star. Douglas Zamensky would narrate.

The movie tells the story of Doug, a young white man from Idaho whose attempt to make it big in Los Angeles is constantly thwarted by the demanding needs of the staff at an Italian restaurant and - to a lesser extent - by the demanding needs of some Rollin 60s Crips who constantly rob him

Doug wisely decides to move to Orange Country and becomes the general manager of Pizzeria Mozza, Newport Beach. It is here, in the restaurant's parking lot, the the famous "fall' occurs   

The film  - also known as "The Grand Fall of Douglas Zamensky" been shown in over 80 countries including France ("Le Grand Chute de Douglas Zamensky") and Uganda (Kuanaguka luu a Douglas Zamensky") is being shown currently at the Cinerama Dome in Hollywood. 

In 2015, the black and white film catapulted past "The Big Lebowski", "It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" and "Young Frankenstein" to move in to 2nd place behind long-time champion "Some Like It Hot."

Stunning $25 Raspberry Chino Farms Popsicle Is Awarded 5 Nods From Nancy Silverton, But Banned From World Competition

An hour after arriving Sunday at Chino Farms for a "Mozza at Home" book signing, "Fumin' Fred" Chino brought out a raspberry popsicle like he was carrying letters of transit out of Casablanca.  

He guardedly looked around, then, in a swift movement  handed it to me. I took a lick and a bite and passed it on. Nancy started licking. She nodded. And nodded, Licked more. And nodded. Sucked. And nodded. And -after a long, slow suck - she gave up the fifth, - and imperial nod. Nancy had given out her highest - and rarest  - rating. Five Nods 

That rave review eased some - though not all - of the sting out of the bombshell, election eve news Monday evening from Switzerland that the Chino Farms popsicle had been banned from the upcoming World Ice Pop Championships in Geneva. Judges ruled it had the unfair advantage of using more than five baskets of Chino Farms raspberries for a single ice pop and that the cost - reportedly 25 bucks a pop - was not doable for most of the planet's population..

Fumin Fred Chino was typical.

"They can go fuck themselves," Fumin Fred said.  "I'd rather have five nods from Nancy than some stupid world championship."

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The Great Escape, The Seventh Game of the World Series Comes Through

The Great Escape. That is major league baseball at its best and it came through, however fleeting, last night.

There were ten or so glorious minutes when the world seemed right. That stretch of time when Cleveland tied it up and the rains came and all that mattered was this baseball game between the Indians and the Cubs.

For that exciting, innocent moment, all of the world’s horrible problems vanished.  There was no thoughts of Aleppo, of my Uncle Harry’s cancer, of the bizarre presidential election, of that nail in my right rear tire.  

All I thought about was baseball. I wish the game was still going on. I wish it was in the 57th inning. 

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Shady Lady, Sqirl Chef Jessica Kowlow's Unsavory "First Toast"

(Editor's Note - The following article is reprinted (without permission) from pages 178-181 of the best-selling cookbook "Everything I Want to Eat Sqirl and the New California Cooking" by Jessica Kowlow)

If you are among the devotees of Jessica Koslow—and her intense dose of Los Angeles known as Sqirl—then you know “The Line.”

If you are not, then be informed that “The Line” is what you will get in when you come to Sqirl. It’s not merely a waiting line. It is Act One of the Sqirl experience. Sqirl without the line, well, it just wouldn’t be as good. Then again, Sqirl without the line is not going to happen.

Customers talk to other customers in that line. They share their latest personal stories. They gossip. They might talk about Jonathan Gold’s latest review or who has been nominated from town for the James Beard Awards. There’ll be Laker and Dodger talk, most recently dominated by the farewell games of Vin Scully. They might even talk politics. Recently, someone in The Line made fun of that independent presidential candidate who didn't know Aleppo by saying "What's Sgirl?". 

But, what they don’t talk about is the criminal past of Jessica Koslow. They don’t talk about that because no one except Jessica, her parents, the judge, the district attorney’s office, and her victims even knew about it.

Until now.

So, folks in “The Line,” here’s a li’l somethin’ to talk about next time you head to Virgil Avenue and Marathon Street for some Moro blood orange with vanilla bean marmalade.

Jessica’s first years on Earth—in Long Beach, California—were crime-free. It was when she moved on to the exclusive Chadwick School in Palos Verdes that the trouble began.

Dr. Jayme Darling, professor of juvenile criminal behavioral studies at Stanford University, said that the transition from a working-class neighborhood such as Long Beach to an affluent community, such as Palos Verdes is often a grueling change for a child.

“A kid like Jessica from the rough and tumble streets of Long Beach suddenly transported to an elite school in Palos Verdes, well, it’s no surprise she started getting into trouble,” Darling said. “Here’s a tough street kid who is accustomed to throwing—and taking—a punch, and now she’s around spoiled kids who are scared shitless by a mere threat.”

A spokesperson for Sqirl, Sara Storrie, declined to comment on Dr. Darling’s theory other than to say, “The Stanford lady professor is generalizing, and at Sqirl that’s not a good thing.”

Regardless, according to the court records and verified by a former vice principal at Chadwick, Koslow punched a boy in the nose in the fifth grade after she misunderstood something he had said.

The following is a school report on the incident:

A boy [name redacted] was making fun of a girl’s bra and said, “Michelle’s bra is stupid.” Jessica Koslow, without any warning, punched him on the nose, causing mild bleeding. Later, Koslow said she thought the boy had said “Michel Bras is stupid.” It was later confirmed that Michel Bras is a renowned French chef with a legendary restaurant in the town of Laguiole, France, and a hero of Koslow’s. When this was confirmed, authorities, knowing Laguiole is famous for its knives, obtained a search warrant and found twenty-nine very sharp steak knives in Jessica’s underwear drawer. Counseling was ordered. 

But the incident that put Koslow in handcuffs happened when she was in the tenth grade. A twelfth grade boy, whose name is protected by the Child Victims Act of 2002, was, according to several eyewitnesses, bullying a group of ninthand tenth-graders. Right before he would push, kick, or punch them, he yelled out, in a very pronounced, exaggerated fashion “I, I, I am going to harm you!”

Observing this, and about to peel a Moro blood orange, was Jessica. As the bully repeated his threat, yelling out the second “I”—with his mouth wide open—Koslow fired the blood orange his way.

Now this blood orange must’ve been guided by the left arm of Sandy Koufax as it went directly into the boy’s agape mouth. It was thrown with such force that not only did it enter the mouth; it lodged in the soft palate. The boy immediately began choking.

As the students looked on in a mix of horror and celebration, Koslow calmly walked over and kicked the boy in the back of his neck. This is where the controversy ensued. As a result of the kick, the boy hurled the blood orange and was able to breathe.

However, the Los Angeles District Attorney’s Office, after a thorough review, said the kick “was not designed to help the boy, but rather to inflict great bodily injury.” (A full report can be seen at www.LACITY.ORG/KOSLOWKICK/ CHADWICK.)

After a brief trial, Koslow was sent to the infamous Los Padrinos Juvenile Hall in Downey. It was here, in one of America’s most notorious juvenile facilities, that Jessica Koslow’s career began.

A brief introduction to the facility is in order. Unlike, say, at San Quentin or Folsom, the cells here had windows. They were barred and tiny. A human could not crawl through but still they were windows. It just so happened that Koslow’s windows were near a fruit orchard where trees were weighed down with Meyer lemons and Moro blood oranges. There were also exceedingly tall brambles—from neglect— with blackberries and raspberries.

One night, as she read Crime and Punishment on her threadbare cot, a lone Meyer lemon and a branch of blackberries blew into her cell on a summer breeze. As she was immersed in the anguish of Rodion Raskolnikov, she absentmindedly grabbed the fruit and, with all her fury, squeezed. A few minutes later—that book always does this to Jessica, to this day— she was asleep.

In the morning, the jail guard abruptly opened her cell door and slid in the daily prison-style “breakfast” of bread and water. As she sat up in that measly cot, she noticed the smashed fruit—the Meyer lemon and blackberries—in a rather pretty clump on the floor. With an elegant movement, she swooped the fruit up with the jailhouse bread and took a bite.

Do you know the opening lines to Irving Berlin’s classic “Cheek to Cheek”? If you do, you know how Jessica felt as she tasted what would become known in Sqirl lore as “The First Toast.” That is how the cooking career of Jessica Koslow began.

“Heaven, I’m in heaven

And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak

And I seem to find the happiness I seek

When we’re out together dancing cheek to cheek” 

This article was first published on pages 178-181 inJessica Koslow's recently released cookbook "Everything I Want To Eat: Sqirl and the New California Cooking" which is available at your local bookstore or - for those with a car - at https://www.amazon.com/Everything-Want-Eat-California-Cooking/dp/141972231X

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1982 Chateau Mouton Rothschild Rated A Record 103 Points By Nancy Silverton, Lawsuit Filed, Soms Stunned Worldwide

Since Robert Parker began rating wines in the 1970s, no bottle has ever been awarded - by him or anyone else - more than 100 points. Until now.  This week, at a Park Avenue townhouse, revered Los Angeles chef Nancy Silverton bestowed a stunning 103 points to a bottle of 1982 Chateau Mouton Rothschild, shattering the previous record for a wine by three entire points. 

"So this is great wine," said a clearly perplexed Silverton as she alternated between sips and guzzles of the famed nectar which features a watercolor by late film maker John Huston as its label.  "I guess what I have been drinking was good wine. There's certainly nothing wrong with that, but what a thrill to drink greatness."

Only hours after the 103 point rating was made public Wednesday afternoon, Pierre Lurton, director of the famed Chateau Cheval Blanc estate in St. Emilion  Bordeaux, filed an international lawsuit on behalf of the late Thierry Mononcourt, the storied winemaker of that estate's mythical 1947 vintage.

Lurton would not talk to the press, but the lawsuit, in part, contains the following; "If the 100 point ceiling was to be shattered, surely the '47 Cheval should have been the one to do it. This is, forgive my tongue, but it's some b*llshit."

The "One-Oh-Three", as it has already become known,, was the talk of the wine world. 

In Los Angeles, soms gathered to discuss the One-Oh-Three. Some believe it marked the end of civilized wine ratings and blamed it on America's current over-the-top pop culture which demands the outrageous. "The wine world needs words not numbers, but flashy numbers get press and sell," said Lyanka Tropea, Imperial Master Sommelier at Perino's on Wilshire Boulevard.   "I suspect, sadly, the 104 rating is not far off. Followed by a 105."

In Karachi, Pakistan, Uzma Bhutto, sommelier at the Bombay Palace in, curiously, Calcutta ( Kolkata), said she was flabbergasted by the unheard of rating. "103?  That's insane. I'd really like to know Silverton's [blood alcohol] level when she gave the score."

William Dithers, professor of wine logistics and logic at Grape Street University, said the uproar over the rating was "absurd and imbecilic."

"Look, Robert Parker and his associates at the Wine Advocate have awarded way more than 400 wines a 100-point rating, " said Dithers, author of the book "2 Trillion Galaxies and Counting; The Sky Has No Limits".  "Do you mean to tell me they are all equal? Some of those so-called "perfect wines" have to be better than others. Therefore, Silverton's 103 makes, well, perfect sense."

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In 2008, Slate magazine published an article by Mike Steinberger titled "The Greatest Wine on the Planet" about the 1947 Cheval. Check it here;   http://www.slate.com/articles/life/drink/2008/02/the_greatest_wine_on_the_planet.html

103 point CMR, with Ravenau and haut brion lurking

103 point CMR, with Ravenau and haut brion lurking

Sidewinder's Last Ride - Rayford Miles, "The Savior of St. Andrews Park", Is Laid To Rest

 "So let the sideshow begin,... Hurry, hurry, step right on in...Can't afford to pass it by.. Guaranteed to make you cry" - 1974 R & B tune "Sideshow" by Blue Magic

There were two monumental funerals in the Southland this past week, one on Thursday and one on Friday.  One was for a white active cop and one was for a black former street gang leader. One arrested people for violent crimes for many years, the other was arrested for violent crimes many years ago. One was shot to death, execution style, the other died of cancer of the stomach.

They appeared, on the surface, to be about as opposite as two 50-something year-old humans could be in Southern California.

But, the bizarre thing about these two men is that they were very much alike and I believe if they had the chance to meet each other – at least in the 21st Century – they would have worked for a common cause, a cause they were both dedicated to; the well-being of young people. The copper and the gangsta mighta even been friends, or at least comrades in the never-ending struggle to help the disadvantaged youth.  

Now, just about everyone in town knows about Steve Owen, the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s sergeant who was shot to death Oct. 5 while pursuing a burglar in Lancaster. Tales of him helping the downtrodden, of driving kids to school and making sure they had lunch money have been well-documented. His funeral was shown live on local television station who interrupted soap operas to broadcast it.

Unfortunately, not as many people – at least outside of the Westside of South-Central - knew about Rayford "Sidewinder" Miles, whose funeral Friday afternoon drew almost as many thousands of mourners as did Owen’s and should have been broadcast live, too.

So here’s to Rayford Miles, the co-founder of what became the 8 Trey Gangster Crips who himself transformed into "The Savior of St. Andrews Park" who died on Oct. 1st of stomach cancer.

How could, you might ask, the co-founder of one of the most notorious street gangs in the United States be remotely aligned or compared to a cop in someplace called Antelope Valley?  Read on and I’ll tell you how.

Rayford John Miles was born on Dec. 5, 1957 in Detroit, but by age three was living on the Eastside of the Southside of Los Angeles, around Main Street and Florence. He was by a sweet, loving child who relished putting together model cars, playing and watching sports and was a big fan of the local teams; the Dodgers, the Rams and the Lakers. He was also a “mama’s boy”.  

Back in the day, Sidewinder woulda probably kicked my ass from St. Andrews Park to Florence and Normandie if I ever called him a “Mama’s boy”, but his older sister Cynthia Miles Davis could get away with it, so I’ll put that claim on her.

“He was a mama’s boy,” said Cynthia, who spoke eloquently of her younger brother at Friday’s funeral at West Angeles Church of God in Christ on Crenshaw near 30th Street. “I would tell him that, even when he was older. He'd tell me "I'm not a little boy anymore, I'm a grown man."  I'm seven years older than Rayford, so I really didn't know his other side of him, because I got married and moved away,"

Judson Bacot, an original Westside Crip, said that when he went away to prison - for his role in the infamous 1972 “leather jacket murder” of Robert Ballou, Jr. at the Hollywood Palladium -  Rayford “was a boy playing sports in the park”

But, by the time Bacot was released 11 years later, Rayford had become “Sidewinder” and was “a for real Crip.”  He was given his nickname by two legends, "Big Hunchie" and Melvin "Skull" Farmer, because the way his mouth went to the side when he talked or smiled. Or looked hard. 

(Out of respect, I went to visit Rayford at Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center a few weeks before he died and I got a dose of the "hard" and "soft" side of Sidewinder.   He wanted me to take a photo of him and put on Facebook to show his loved ones he was still battling.  The first two photos, he had  his thumb up and a fierce look. Even though the disease had taken close to 100 pounds away from his fighting weight, he still had the scowl.  I suggested maybe he could smile for the next photo.  He did. I showed him the three photos and he pointed to the smiling shot and said "That one.")

He had “hands” and a charisma that enabled him to connect with many people. But, by then, the original intent of the Crips, at least as espoused by the gang’s founder, Raymond Washington, to protect communities, had fractured.

Very briefly – without getting too far from Sidewinder’s funeral - when the original Westside Crips split up into various factions – most notably the Hoover Crips, Rollin’ 60 Crips and Original Westside Gangster Crips (which became the 8 Trey Gangsters - the sets got along. These were the days when Crips factions only beefed with various Bloods gangs. But, in 1979, said to be on March 8th, the shootings and killing began amongst Crip factions.

Since then, the street battles between 60s and Eight Trey have been among the deadliest in Los Angeles, if not America. .So, at the funeral, it was a sign of upmost respect when some veteran Rollin’ 60s showed up to pay their respect to Sidewinder.

"You don't find better people than Side," said original Rollin' 60 member Baby Face, who mulled about the church lobby with other 60s and Eighty Treys ."I have the up-most respect for him. He brought people together. Look around. I hope the younger people can learn from him."

Another triple OG 60 said the same. 

"I love him," said Robert "Slu" Addison. "Regardless of the beef between the two hoods, he was my friend."

Melvin Farmer, who with Shirley Matthews and the love of Rayford's life, Erika Gray, was at his side when he died, said he hoped the outpouring of respect would spread throughout the city. "We need to all come together." 

The funeral began with two scripture readings, one for the Old Testament,  Psalms 23, and one from the New Testament, Peter 5.  His obituary was read by Sil' Verr Loudermill and then a video was played.

Kleenex, the tissue company, did a very brisk business at Rayford’s funeral, especially during that video tribute which played Blue Magic’s 1974 hit “Sideshow” as background music.  When the lyrics at the top of this story rang out, there were some dry eyes in the church, but not very many. It’s always a memorable scene when men with 18-inch biceps who’ve done 18 years in Folsom or Pelican Bay or Susanville get teary-eyed.

After the video, heeding Rayford's last command, only two people spoke, a godson and a reverend.  

Reverend Joyce Reece Kitchen told the mourners that just because Rayford had died, did not mean his good work did, too.

“Alexander Graham Bell has long been in the grave, but the phone still rings. Thomas Edison is also buried, but the light still shines. And Rayford’s positive influences cannot be erased. Tomorrow, each of you should be Rayford to a child in need. If we all do that, Rayford Miles’ legacy will live on.”  

Rayford's godson, Philip Wiley, Sr., said he got lucky when his parents moved near the St. Andrews Park when he was a kid.

“We don’t get to choose where our parents move to, but in 1969 I was blessed to move to 83rd and St. Andrews,” said Wiley. “My parents didn’t know it because they died, but they moved me next to my guardian angel."

Wiley spoke lovingly of Rayford’s tough exterior and tender heart.

“He tried to have this mean front, but when you got to know him, he was the nicest man you’ve ever known. He taught me everything I needed to know about being a man. I was a knucklehead and he gave me a chance. Thanks to him, I earned a college degree. Three degrees. He was not only the best man at my wedding, be was the best man in my life. 

"When Rayford got out [of prison] I was all turnt up and ready for action.“ said Wiley. “But, Rayford said ‘No. We’re gonna change the whole thing at the park.’ Now, this is a park no one in the city wanted to go to. No one. Except the homies.”

But, under Rayford’s guidance and leadership, people, mainly kids, started going to St. Andrews Park and, well, making it what a park is meant to be. A place to play, a place to relax.  It wasn’t unusual for 250 kids to be at St. Andrews Park.  

“I hope tomorrow the homies pull in some kid, just like Side pulled me in," Wiley said.

The entire crowd suddenly rose as one and shattered the quiet of the church with a thunderous ovation.  

There weren’t any children playing in St. Andrews Park on Friday afternoon. Some were at the funeral. Some were home. But, today, Saturday, you can bet your last $83 dollars St. Andrews Park will be alive and well. 

Thanks to Rayford Miles. T,.I. P. Sidewinder.

Rayford "sidewonder" Miles is about to go on his final ride

Rayford "sidewonder" Miles is about to go on his final ride