"He Poured Out His Love...And His Wine" - My Grand Wine Collection

Published in Fresno Bee, Nov. 3, 1999

I once had a grand collection of wine..

Mostly Bordeaux from the heralded 1982 vintage, a few bottles from the legendary 1961 crop, and one glorious bottle of 1947 Chateau Cheval Blanc that I treated like a newborn, swaddling it in terry cloth towels when ever I moved it.  My temperature-controlled wine locked in West Los Angeles cooled the hottest of California Cabernet Sauvignon from the '84, '85, and '86 vintage. 

Then I met Carmen.. 

Carmen lived the high life. She had a town house in swanky Century City and an apartment on East 50th Street in Manhattan, two blocks from the famous French restaurant Lutece where she was a fixture in the dining room. 

She had dresses that cost more than my 1983 Ford Ranger.

We met four years ago (1995) when we sat next to each other at a luncheon featuring 1988 red burgundies at trendy Campanile in Los Angeles.  Though there were eight other people at the upstairs private dining room, we hardly noticed them

After the luncheon, we walked down the street, sat on a once-elegant - now tattered - old couch that a La Brea Avenue used furniture store had on sidewalk display and talked until the sun went down 

I called her the next day, but she was off to New York. When she came back to Los Angeles, we went to dinner. I brought along a Chateau Beaucastel, 1978.  The next morning, I brought her some blood orange juice. It did the trick better than the classic Rhone.

We had a great week and the she went back to New York for business.

Then I lost my job. I was a city hall reporter from the Los Angeles Times and was smacked in a huge layoff.

But, I didn't tell Carmen about the job loss. I mean, why tell someone 3,000 miles away you're unemployed? What good does that do?  Certainly wouldn't score me any points. Anyway, I figured I'd be back on the job soon.

But, work didn't come so easily. Freelancing was rough. 

Still, I was having fun. We talked every night. Like kids, sometimes for an hour. She had class and she knew white burgundies like no one I'd ever known. 

She would be back in LA. in a month and we'd have a swell time, she told me. 

But, at that time, my money, never a strong point, was hitting new depths. The checking account was dwindling faster than a bottle of Krug on New Year's Eve. My savings account, like the gas tank on a V-12 Ferrari Enzo after a drive from Sanger to Sonoma, was on empty. My credit cards were as useless as merlot from North Dakota. 

My only financial plus was my 401(k) account, but I knew if I went into it, I would be taxed and penalized 50%. The financial crisis had not yet reached that panicked stage. No, this was just run-of-the-mil desperation.

Plain and simple, I needed a lot of extra cash to lavish on a girl. Why else does one need extra cash anyway?

One July night, she called and said she was coming back to Los Angeles in three days. She couldn't wait to see me, she said softly.

I needed some romancing cash, I thought.

I did the unthinkable.

Now, I know any true wine lover reading this may find what follows deplorable But, this might be love. Or at least a romantic case of lust.

I started selling my wine collection.  

The first to go were the extras I had of first-growth Bordeaux from the '82 and '83 vintages.  Heck, some of them aren't drinkable for another decade, I reasoned to myself. What good are they doing me collecting dust in some freezing Westside warehouse, I rationalized. Anyway, I'd sell them, get back on my financial feet in a year or two and start buying them back, I planned. 

I walked into 20/20 Wine in Los Angeles like I was carrying letters of transit out of Casablanca. I sold an 1982 Cheval Blanc I had bought for $60  I got $150, $160 for it. A Latour, Margaux, a Mouton from 1982 and I had $700.

Then I took a few bottles out of my cellar to drink.

Carmen came to town and I was ready for her with a magnum of '85 Dom Perignon Rose at her townhouse and reservations at Valentino, my favorite Italian restaurant.

That was a grand week.

She went back to New York, wanting to know when I was going to come see her in Manhattan.  I sold more bottles, mostly California Cabernet, and soon boarded a midnight flight to New York City.  

We dined grandly thee: Lutece (Zind Humbrecht Tokay Pinot Gris); Lespinasse (Montrachet from Ramonet); Union Square Cafe (Screaming Eagle Cabernet with the best cheeseburgers). It was wonderful.

I flew back to LAX. My cousin Greg took me home. I borrowed five bucks to eat the next day.

This continued for six months. Carmen would come back. I'd go to New York. Soon, my wine locker looked like downtown Beirut during the civil war. Desolation reigned. Only a few bottles, like the survivors of the Battle of Stalingrad, remained. 

Then, over a  series of  painful phone calls, Carmen let me know that it was all over for us. She had met a rich man. I knew all along this wasn't gong to be a lasting relationship, but, still it kinda hurt.

However, no sooner did I get dumped, I got a new, better job back at the Times covering South Central Los Angeles and Watts. Within  a few months, I met a beautiful woman and forgot about Carmen.

Through that disaster, I managed to keep the 1947 Chateau Cheval Blanc. But,  the '82 Bordeaux are gone. A few drunk, the majority sold.

I thought about that foolish period of my life - one of many - the other day when I saw a bottle of 1982 Cheval Blanc for $595.

But, hey, things are going better now. Maybe my irrational logic for selling them wasn't that far off. I have an even better job now at the Fresno Bee and maybe one day I will be able to buy them back. That would be nice.

Nancy's Fancy Garners Second Highest Number of Superlatives in the United States This Week

During its three-day premiere at the Winter Fancy Food Show in San Francisco, Nancy's Fancy, the gelato of Nancy Silverton, was the subject of 56,242 registered superlatives, the second highest total for any noun in the United States during that time period, an official said Wednesday.

"Great","Wonderful", "Do me, Baby, do me", "Magnificent", "Amazing", "Oh, my God" "Wow!", "Delicious" and others were being gushed during the Sunday, Monday and Tuesday event in the Moscone Center at such a rapid clip that the Superlative Board of America (SBOA) had to add a second counting machine.

Praise for the four flavors of Nancy's Fancy, ( three gelati and one sorbetto) ranked 2nd only to the superlatives uttered by visitors at the Tunnel View in Yosemite National Park which tallied 61,061 praises. (An estimated 12,000 utterances were for the two lunatics climbing El Capitan's "Dawn Wall" without climbing aids other than harnesses and ropes.)

The flavors, members of  the elite "Squad Seven", were Salted Peanut Butter with chocolate, Greek Yogurt with red fruits of the forest, Cold-brewed Stumptown Coffee with cardamon, cinnamon and nutmeg, and Coconut sorbetto  with chocolate strands. An employee of Nancy's Fancy, speaking on the condition of anonymity, said the other three flavors that comprise Squad Seven did not travel to San Francisco from Los Angeles  "due to security issues." The employee would not elaborate further.

Nancy's Fancy is expected to be available to the public in early Spring. 

Jerry Hauser, the director of SBOA, said that he expects Nancy's Fancy numbers to get even higher upon release and he was seeking federal funding to acquire a faster counting machine.

"Both McLaren and Ferrari are working on a high-speed superlative counter," Hauser said. "We might need both of them this spring when people come to Yosemite and gaze out from Tunnel View while savoring Nancy' Fancy."

Nancy Silverton To Unveil New Gelato at the Fancy Food Show, San Francisco Officials Urge Calm

When a photo showing what appeared to be two pints of gelato with the name "Nancy's Fancy" was leaked to the press earlier this week, speculation in the ice cream world revved up like a McLaren P1 down the Mulsanne straight in Le Mans. Was it a hoax? Or was this for reals? Was it Granada I see, or only Asbury Park?*  Well, now, it is official. Nancy Silverton will be making gelato and sorbetto in pints that will be sold in stores across the United States.

After  the announcement was made Wednesday morning in Grape Street Park that "Nancy's Fancy" was indeed happening, the grand chefs of America could not contain their delight.  Mario Batali was the first to comment  (see below) issuing a statement akin to a Hendrix solo. Legendary pizzaiolo Chris Bianco soon followed, riffing off "Jaws", ("I'm gonna need a bigger spoon"), as did Jonathan Waxman and many more.  San Francisco chef Dominique Crenn emailed thoughts on "Nancy's Fancy" so titillating, so rife with sensual possibilities, that she has been banned from Brazil for six months. 

The public grew excited, too. After all, this wasn't a treat that would only be available to the chosen few, only offered to a smattering of the privileged. Nancy's Fancy will be offered throughout America later this year.

"In the frozen section of the supermarket, it is s going to be like all the other ultra-premium ice creams and gelato will be wearing a nice department store outfit and then, boom!, here comes Nancy's Fancy decked out in Marni, looking like she's going to the Academy Awards. No, Make that the James Beard Awards since Nancy has already won there four times”, said Suzanne Tracht, chef owner of the acclaimed Jar in Los Angeles. (Silverton has been honored by the James Beard Foundation for Outstanding Pastry Chef in America, Outstanding Restaurant (Campanile) in America, Who's Who of Food and Beverage in America, and, just last year, as the Outstanding Chef in America.).

The public will get their first opportunity to sample Nancy's Fancy this coming Sunday, January 11 at the Winter Fancy Food Show in San Francisco ( https://www.specialtyfood.com/shows-events/winter-fancy-food-show/) which will continue on Monday and Tuesday at the Moscone Center, Nancy and her executive pastry chef Dahlia Narvaez will be there to hand out 5,000 samples of four Nancy's Fancy flavors.  

Still, with all the excitement, there is concern that the rush for the stuff will be overwhelming. Therefore, the City of San Francisco is taking extraordinary measures to  ensure bedlam doesn't ensue both inside and outside of the Moscone Center. 

"Nancy's Fancy is the greatest thing to happen in the ice cream/gelato world since Noah let two cows on that Ark," said San Francisco Mayor Jerry Rice. "But, on the other spoon, we need to contain this as the Fancy Food show has the potential for calamity. There will be 5,000 portions of Nancy's Fancy available. There are  837,442 people living in San Francisco. You don't have to be 'ol Stevie Hawking to figure out there's gonna be 832, 442 disgruntled citizens in my town.".  

A San Francisco Police Department commander, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, said police have been carefully studying the classic "Do's and Dont's of Crowd Control" by Attila the Hun, the colorful 5th-Century invader known for, among other things,  his unique way of handling large groups of people.  (It should be noted the book is now considered a masterpiece on how not to address large crowds, including avoiding such sayings as "You're  gonna wish you never came here", and "What the fuck did i just say?".

Still, most say the excitement to get the Nancy's Fancy will be worth a line or two. 

These are the four flavors will be available at the show  Chunky Salted Peanut  Butter/with Crunchy  chocolate; Cold-Brewed Spiced Stumptown Coffee with Cracked Cocoa Nibs, Greek Yogurt & Mixed Berries; Coconut Stracciatella with Bitterweeet Chocolate Strands.

A Special Report on the Flavors is coming soon. But,revisit this article about Nancy and Dahlia's Salted Peanut Butter.  http://krikorianwrites.com/blog/2014/1/12/nw6s2jk2qectcua6hpzok65h65cc2n

Here's what Mario Batali said about Nancy and her gelato.  “Nancy is the goddess of the delicious and the most inspired and inspirational cook I know in everything from pizza to panini so its natural that I have always been/will forever be in LOVE/LUST for her gelato  it is if the angels opened their freezers and delicate flakes of frozen genius are falling from the skies like notes from a jimi hendrix solo, each one different yet mellifluous and delightful on its own or as a full on symphonic poem to the magnificence of her creamy, sensational and ultimately satisfying work in frosty frolic.”

 * - "At Long Last Love"  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRFbKBHvLXs

NRL Shocker - Pizzeria Mozza Trades Tagorda For Chi Spacca's DeNicola

In news that sent shock waves throughout the National Restaurant League, United Mozza announced Sunday that Pizzeria sous chef Joe "GQ" Tagorda will be traded to Chi Spacca for their own sous chef, Ryan Vito DeNicola. 

Although complete details of the trade were not made public, sources said Spacca would also get two first round 2015 draft choices from the Culinary Institute of America, while Pizzeria Mozza would get a new front door which completely shuts..

Pizzeria Mozza general manager Arielle Chernin said she was delighted to be getting DeNicola. "He's a very nice guy and I say any time an Italian restaurant can get guy who has 'Vito' for middle name, go for it."

Tagorda who worked at the Pizzeria for nearly five years, was excited about the trade.  "I'm thrilled to be joining the Chi Spacca team and I know i can make the place more stylish," said Tagorda in his last official oven appearance Sunday evening at the Pizzeria. "The food is great at Spacca. but have you ever seen the way Chad dresses? Not exactly Ralph Lauren."

In his career at Pizzeria Mozza, Tagorda made 2,130 pizzas, burning 145. for a very fine 93% success rating.  (In comparison, storied pizzaiola Chris Bianco, of Pizzeria Bianco in Phoenix has 98.8 % completion rating, highest of all active pizza makers in the National Restaurant League.. On the other end of the spectrum, former cook Sam Schramberg had a 5% completion rating, burning 19 or the 20 pizzas he made as a line cook before moving onto management.)

DeNicola, in his nearly two years at Chi Spacca, grilled for 520 bistecca alla Fiorentina, botching only 26 or them,  (95%) and had a very impressive 93.2% satisfaction rating on his tomahawk chop..

Tagorda was unfazed by those numbers. "Yes Ryan is fine cook, but I look better."

Spacca's chef Chad Colby said he would miss his long-time right hand man  but was glad to get out of DeNicola's five-year contract, rumored to be $7 million a year, plus incentives. Tagorda will start out making $9 an hour, but could go up to $13.25 by 2017. In addition, Spacca will pay for Tagorda's personal grooming, said to run upwards of  $1,500 a day. 

Top Secret Photo Reveals the Future of Gelato in Nancy Silverton's Freezer

Rumors have been circulating for months that Nancy Silverton was going to be making gelato and sorbetto sold in pints available in markets across the United States. Every time reporters had questioned her about this venture, she would simply reply "Nothing has been signed."

When reached in Italy early Sunday morning, January 3rd, Silverton told a reporter "Haven't you anything better to write about? Aren't there all those killings on the streets that begin with 80?" Then she hung up.

However, an appliance repairman, making a routine house call to Silverton's home in Green Meadows, was both pleasantly surprised and deeply disappointed when he opened her freezer New Year's Day and saw an enticing pint of something labeled. "Nancy's Fancy".

The repairman, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, said "I hadn't been so excited since opening night at Pizzeria Mozza."  He quickly snapped a  photograph (seen below) with the Hassleblad 503CW he carries on his tool belt.

Alas, the thrill was soon over. The container was empty. However, there was evidence something had been ravaged  inside that container as fork marks were clearly visible.

Novelist Ruth Reichl, no stranger to Silverton's freezer, would not comment on the photograph's credibility even though, according to the repairman, the back of the container recounts a story of Reichl seeing Silverton sitting on a floor churning away.

Renowned San Francisco chef Dominique was thrilled at even the prospect of a gelato made by Nancy Silverton. When told of its possibility, she dipped into a sensual reverie. "Hot winter in San Francisco. I am taken by surprise by 100 degree Fahrenheit. While strolling the streets, my body is craving a sweet luxurious taste of refreshing goodness  I need to find that place, not negotiable. Nothing can take the place of my Nancy's Fancy.

More to come as this important story unfolds. And folds. 

A spokesman for Tim tam said "That's one classy ass freezer."

. 

LA Weekly Review Slams Chi Spacca as Not "World Class", Demonstrations Erupt in Three Continents

Demonstrations continued to erupt over the weekend in three continents after a scathing restaurant review in the Los Angeles Weekly boldly stated that Chi Spacca, the revered Mozza Family restaurant, was not "World Class".

The review, published in the Dec.18, 2014 issue of the Weekly, highly-praised Chi Spacca for service and food, and even awarded it a rare four stars signifying it as "excellent", but stopped short of the top honor of five stars which the paper defines as "World-Class".

"To flat out deny Chi Spacca the world class status is a travesty," said Maurice Curnonsky, the  Prince of Gastronomy in Paris.  "If you picked up Spacca and dropped it on the Rue Royale it would be a smashing success. If it was plunked down in old London town, there'd be a line around the block to get in. Same thing for Rio, Tokyo, Khartoum, and Moscow. If that's not world class, then what is?" 

While the demonstrations for the most part were peaceful, several people were arrested Sunday night in Pyongyang, North Korea for carrying signs that read "Chef [Chad] Colby cooks better than Kim Jong-un".  Jong-un, a self-proclaimed "Grill Master" was said to be distraught over the signs.

In the Central African Republic, interim president Catherine Samba-Panza called for a six-week ban on the Weekly. "In times like these, we all need to come together and encourage each other, not deny dreams," said Samba-Panza at a unruly news conference held Monday morning in the capital city of Bangui. "Hell, Colby and  [sous chef] DeNicola make a Bistecca alla Congo that is to spear for."

Also, outside of Gallup, New Mexico, 13 Apaches were arrested Sunday morning when they threw tomahawk pork chops at passing tourists, one who sustained a black and blue eye. 

To the review's credit, the Weekly lauded Spacca for its steaks ("some of Los Angeles' great special-occasion dishes") , its charcuterie ("fantastic") and added chef Colby's "food should be considered a prize."

While many were upset Chi Spacca didn't get the five, others were astounded .the world, with all its problems, would react so vociferously.  

"What the big fuss all over the world about Spacca getting only four stars? " said Ludo Lefebvre chef owner of Trois Mec and Petit Trois, both of which were awarded four stars by the Weekly. "Get over it. It is four stars. Be happy. I was."

One customer was thrilled Spacca did not get five stars.

"I wish they only got two stars so it would be easier to get in," said Dan Pirelli, owner of the Wine Hotel on 3rd Street who did not eat at Chi Spacca on October 13, November 10th and Dec. 3rd. 

Chef Chad Colby, who had predicted Spacca would get six stars, could not be reached for comment.

****

The Weekly review -http://www.laweekly.com/squidink/2014/12/16/chi-spacca-review-artistry-well-beyond-the-butchers-block

Lamb Chops at Athens Taverna Rated "Good Enough For Zeus"

My dining highlight during four days in Greece last week was at simple taverna in Athens  called To Steki tou Ilia in the neighborhood of Thiselo, if that means anything to you.

i savored  what I later learned had been rated by The International Panel  (TIP) as "Good Enough For Zeus" (GEFZ);  lamb chops, known here as "paidakia",  so tasty that i contemplated ordering another portion because I did not want this delicious dinner to end. 

The chops - marinated in thyme oregano. lemon juice, salt and  pepper then charcoal grilled to smoky, thin succulence   - are listed on the menu as a kilo (2.2. pounds) for 30 euro. But,  the owner/waiter he hooked me up with a single portion for nine euro!  One of the restaurant world's supreme bargains. 

I need to give credit to one Despina Trivolis who wrote an article for the excellent website Culinary Backstreets in September 28, 2012 that I luckily found.  Thank you, Despina. whoever you are. Here's her article  http://www.culinarybackstreets.com/athens/2012/paidakia/

To Steki tou Ilia (first branch) Address: Eptachalkou 5, Thiseio Telephone: +30 210 345 8052  Hours: Mon.-Fri. 8pm-midnight; Sat. noon-4pm & 8pm-midnight; Sun. noon-4pm NOTE I went on a Sunday and it was open at 9 p,m, so check 

There is a second branch nearby.

* This was the only dish I had in Greece rated GEFZ by TIP. However, TIP did give  a Good Enough For Ajax (GEFA) to a roasted lamb shoulder at a family cafe called Godfather in Corfu and a Good Enough For Agamemnon (GEFAG) to the octopus at To Kare Tou Meze in Itea, near Delphi.  https://www.facebook.com/ToKareTouMeze

** Zeus himself, who has a palace about three kilometers away, is usually at the first location on Tuesday for lunch and Friday for dinner at table 4, eating kilos of chops and deciding which worldwide calamities are worth his direct involvement. 

Lamb chops good enough for the gods

The Oracle of Delphi Explains Why Monty is Leaving Los Angeles

I was in Greece when the shocking news broke that Montgomery "Monty" Maguire,  the most charmingly disgruntled employee in the long, colorful history of Mozza - and one of my favorites - was leaving. I asked Nancy why and she said  "He's moving to the south".  

Why? I mean who would actually move to the south? I had never even heard of such a thing. The day after hearing this, I found myself in the ancient city of Delphi so I hiked up to the Temple of Apollo where the Oracle of Delphi resides, ( rent free for over 3,000 years I am told) and had a fairly extensive chat with Pythia, the oracle and a priestess of Apollo, the Sun God himself. Talk about a gig. 

I had many questions for her, including one Nancy told me to ask the oracle., ("What is the meaning of life?).  Then I asked Pythia the real reason Monty was leaving Los Angeles. She blew off the rest of a joint and told me the following. 

"The real reasons Monty is leaving are varied and complex, The following played vital roles in his decision to leave town."

9. Felt responsibility and shame for having poured Verona her first drink and leading her down a path of debauchery and pillage.

8. Could no longer work with Brian Monahan after his daughter Marlo told him, "That guy looks at me funny."

7. Grew weary of hearing the countless tales of Puerto Rican life in the South Bronx from Luis.

6. Fled after being tipped off a DEA investigation had uncovered the "tapenade" Taylor Grant would ask for during shifts was actually black tar heroin.

5. Did not want Marlo growing up surrounded by hipster douche bags who complained their chablis was not "flinty" enough

4. Got a better paying job as Tony Romo's personal masseuse.

3.. Heard that David Rosoff had sold TMZ security camera footage of Monty and Timothy Jenkins (aka "That Black Bartender") locked in an intimate embrace while "closing "

2. Re-upped with Delta Force and is going to Syria and Iraq to kill those cowardly ISIL pussies

And the Number One reason Monty is leaving? Could no longer resist the way his wife Elizabeth Few would say "You know, Montgomery, Virginia is for lovers."

I'll miss you Monty. 

The Sun God's Temple in Delphi, Greece

Meal of the Year at an Outpost of the World's Greatest Chef

A few days ago, Nancy S and I had a lunch so supreme at a hotel in Monte Carlo it easily warranted  the headline of this post. The headline is even kinda mild. I’ve had some great restaurant meals with Nancy over the past eleven years, but for sheer flavor, sheer close-your-eyes deliciousness of every bite, nothing topped this lunch at the at Joel Robuchon’s restaurant at the Hotel Metropole.

This outpost of Robuchon, at 69 still the world’s greatest chef, is not on any lists of the world’s best restaurants. And I can understand that. This is not even a flagship of  the Supernatural One, who has Michelin three star establishments in Macau, Tokyo, Hong Kong and Las Vegas. The guy has a total of something like 25 Michelin stars, two of them at this restaurant in Monte Carlo where Christopher Cussac is the head chef.

And I get why this Monaco spot is not a “Three Star’, which requires more than simply divine food. Three times plates crashed to the floor of the dining room and kitchen entrance point. And the décor, while attractive, is like a good hotel dining room. We walked in without a reservation.

But, the food, it rendered superlatives useless.  We sat at a counter with a close view of the open kitchen where the cooks moved with precision and almost never spoke. (This is in 180 degree contrast from Robuchon's mythical restaurant Jamin in Paris where he first earned acclaim and where local L.A. chefs Sang Yoon and Ludo Lefebvre worked and said they were constantly yelled at by the master's chef de cuisine Benoit Guichard to the point of cruelty)  

From a standing start, the meal took off like the 1,200 horsepower Bugatti Veyron Super Sport parked in front of the hotel; a rolling cart of eight breads and rolls and a cylinder of Bordier butter – salted to Robuchon’s specs – the size of 155 mm howitzer shell.  I started with what they called a puff pastry roll coated with the butter. I had 11 of them, all slathered, which I was later told was just two short of the world record held by Franz Klammer, the skier.

There was a platter of Iberico ham from Joselito, and some tomato bread that Nancy found full of wonder. There was this soup of  cockles, calms and chanterelles in a vermouth shellfish broth that needs to have its own category and roasted lamb, me, some shoulder and leg, Nancy, some rib chops.

The bill was 360 euro with a couple glasses of red Coteaux-d'Aix-en-Provence.

The younger generation may hear about other chefs being the top.. But, I think those chefs, most of them, at least, would agree that Joel Robuchon is the greatest chef in the world.