BELKIND AND FALKNER SKYROCKET IN FAMOUS ELIZABETH RANKINGS AFTER DELIVERING FOOD TO NANCY AT SAN QUARANTINE

When the 2019 rankings of the “Most Famous Elizabeths in History “ were released in January, the usual suspects - Queen Elizabeth II, Elizabeth Taylor, Elizabeth “Bewitched” Montgomery, Elizabeth Warren and Queen Elizabeth I - were on their perennial top five spots.

But, yesterday in emergency rating session released due to Covid. two newcomers had rocketed like bats out of hell to claim spots in the top five. Knocking Elizabeth Taylor and Queen Elizabeth II out of the top five were American chefs Elizabeth Falkner and Elizabeth Belkind, both of whom braved “Stay At Home’ laws to bring food to San Quarantine where Nancy Silverton was hold up in lockdown with her cellie Michael Krikorian, who is, well. lets just say he’s not exactly Fredy Girardet.

Belkind, the executive pastry chef and partner - with Lisa J Olin- of the revered Cake Money Bakery on Beverly Boulevard, had unexpectedly - and delightfully - showed up in mid-March at Mozza with 100s of sumptuous muffins for the free Restaurant Workers Relief program funded by Maker’s Mark Whiskey and distributed out of Chi Spacca.

In early April, when she learned Nancy had tested “positive’, Elizabeth B texted she would leave something on the porch bench, a practice that became known as “Drop Drop Droppin’ At Nancy’s Door” based on the 1973 Bob Dylan classic “Knock Knock Knockin on Heaven’s Door”.

An hour later, she left a basket of cakes and cookies on the porch bench and they were soon being ravaged. There was “Li’l Merri’s”, an oatmeal cream pie sandwich cookie filled with maple vanilla buttercream that, hold up, hold on. Let me repeat that. This is an oatmeal cookie filled with maple vanilla buttercream. Is that even legal? Anyway, in case it isn’t, we got rid of the evidence quickly.

There was a slew of mini cakes including a Back & White Cakewich filled with vanilla cream. Valrhona crunchy “pearls” and coated in bittersweet chocolate.

Three days later, Elizabeth Falkner. was “Drop Drop Droppin at Nancy’s Door” (Bob Dylan has just released that) with an array of delights with Spanikopita, homemade filo dough filled with feta, spinach, dandelion greens. dill, mint and parsley and pot stickers with chicken thigh meat and pork belly with ginger, scallions and a sauce made of rice vinegar, ponzu, chili and sesame. Also a risotto with asparagus, spring onion, Parmesan and chicken stock.

Falkner also brought apricot rugalasch and a two-ton caramel glob that went swimmingly well with Chad Colby’s honeycomb ice cream from Antico.

We ate well.

A spokes person for Queen Elizabeth I said while she was disappointed to be out of the Top Five Elizabeths, she understood why. “Maybe Belkind and Falkner will teach her how to cook better,” said Dahlia Narvaez, the Queen’s spokeswoman. “Or at least how to cook,”